Note to self: crying doesn’t make you weak
Note to self: crying doesn’t make you weak
cis people aren’t allowed to edit my papers anymore
"WHAAATT? I HAVE TO EXPLAIN MY WORK??? IN MY OWN PAPER??? WHAT THE FUUUCK??"
It’s not my job to educate you, teacher.
I’m betting one hundred bucks that this is a comment about a really badly written essay and not someone being actively transphobic.
well, you’re about to owe me one hundred bucks.
- this is not the first time i mentioned privilege in the paper. or cisgender. this paper was written on my personal experiences with being trans, and the difficulties i’ve faced because of it, and the difficulties that cisgender people with otherwise comparable lives have not faced.
- the terms privilege and cisgender had both been thoroughly elaborated on in this paper.
- this paper was written for a women’s studies class, on gender analysis, in which both privilege and cisgender privilege in particular had been explained, elaborated upon, and discussed by the professor.
- the comment was not by the professor, it was by a cis classmate during a peer review.
- the words cisgender and privilege are both in scare quotes (in case you can’t google that or don’t know what it means or want to deny their existence, scare quotes is when you put a word or phrase in quotation marks to make it seem less real — the textual version of sarcastically making air quotes with your fingers)
- another edit, by the same editor, involved asking me what my birth name was. i’m sure you don’t need to be told that that’s transphobic.
- i spoke to the professor about this edit, and he agreed with me that the comment (and the way it was phrased) was out of line. in fact, he thought it was so out of line that he led a workshop for the class on how not to be disrespectful assholes to trans people (say, by asking for their birth name, or telling them they’re wrong or oversensitive about transphobia).
- i got a 99% on the essay — WITHOUT changing anything the edit asked for.
- the professor liked my essay so much that he asked to keep it as an EXAMPLE for future classes
bonus: if your reaction to seeing gross transphobic things is “well it’s probably the trans person’s fault”, then you’re gross and transphobic and i hope you don’t know any trans people IRL for their sake
Posted by philburt
yeah thats cute, but imagine how heartbroken he will be when he finds out it’s not real.
And that is a DAMN good response to the age old issue.
This sign is in my doctors office above the scale and I really love it. It actually made me feel a lot better after reading it
this should be in every doctors office
i scrolled down for an explanation and there was none
this is what i just picked up from the grocery store. it cost $32. Thirty. two. dollars. for 1 pineapple, 2 bags of grapes, a small container of raspberries, 1 soft drink and 2/$1 nuts….
do you know how much junk food i could have for $32? do you have any clue how much McDonald’s you can get for $32?
stop shaming fat people poorer than you or people poorer than you in general for not eating healthier. stop lying about how cheap it is or how it’s comparable to fast food. just stop.
OKAY SO I’M GONNA DROP A STORY ON Y’ALL
MY FOLLOWERS KNOW THAT I’M PRETTY UNIQUE LOOKING
I HAVE A GNARLY UNDERCUT, A SHORT HAIRCUT, AND AS OF YESTERDAY MY HAIR IS BRIGHT PURPLE, AND I TEND TO WEAR CLOTHES OF THE ALL-BLACK-SHORT-SKIRTS-THIGH-HIGHS-INTIMIDATING-HEAD-BITCH-IN-CHARGE VARIETY
MY FOLLOWERS ALSO KNOW THAT I HAVE A RAD LITTLE THREE-YEAR-OLD SON NAMED OLIVER WHO IS MY WORLD
ONE DAY, OLIVER AND I WERE AT THE STORE, AND WE WERE WALKING PAST THE CEREAL, SINGING A SONG TOGETHER AND OVERALL JUST BEING CUTE BECAUSE WE’RE FUCKING ADORABLE, AND THIS MIDDLE-AGED WOMAN WAS WALKING THE OTHER WAY WITH HER HUSBAND AND DAUGHTER. I’M USED TO PEOPLE STARING AT ME, ESPECIALLY CONSIDERING I WAS ROCKING BLUE HAIR AND A OUIJA BOARD SHIRT AND A HELLA CUTE VELVET MINISKIRT THIS SPECIFIC DAY, SO I IGNORED HER GLARING AT ME AND CONTINUED ON LOOKING AT THE PANDA PUFFS
THEN I STARTED HEARING HER MUTTER UNDER HER BREATH ABOUT ME, SAYING STUFF LIKE, “Irresponsible teen mom couldn’t keep her legs closed” AND, “Her son is going to be so messed up because she has absolutely no self-respect”
NORMALLY I JUST LET IT GO, BUT THAT DAY OLIVER AND I WERE SINGING THE SHINS SO I WAS IN A REALLY GOOD MOOD AND FELT CONFIDENT, SO I STOPPED MY CART AND SAID, “Excuse me, did you say something?”. SHE KINDA STARTED BLUSHING AND SAID NO, TO WHICH I REPLIED, “Well, it seems you kinda did say something. Something about me being irresponsible and not having respect for myself?” AND THIS WOMAN WAS BRIGHT RED AT THIS AND HER HUSBAND WAS JUST TRYNA HURRY HER ALONG AT THAT POINT BUT I HELLA WAS NOT GONNA LET HER GET AWAY WITH SHIT TALKING ME SO I SAID, “You know, I do respect myself. I have my hair like this because I respect myself enough to do it and have the confidence to pull it off, and I dress like this because I respect the fact that I have killer legs that I don’t want to hide just because some old crows glare at me over it. My self-respect has nothing to do with my parenting ability, but if it did, I’d say it’s been a positive correlation because my son is respectful of everyone and doesn’t judge people based on their appearances. He knows that people look how they do because that’s just how they want to look, and that’s how all three-year-olds are until they get to the age where they see the fact that their parents are scowling at a girl who has bright hair, or a boy who wears a skirt, and that’s the age where they become insufferable assholes like you.” AND LET ME JUST SAY THIS WOMAN’S JAW DROPPED FASTER THAN THE TRIX BOX SHE WAS HOLDING AS I FUCKIN SASHAYED OUT WITH MY PANDA PUFFS AND CARRIED ON SINGING~*~*~
Know your place!
A guide for anyone who wants to write about royals.
Always reblog Noble Hierarchy.
Also, female equivalents:
‘Cause people seem to only post the 20-something Audrey Hepburn.
Audrey Hepburn was the granddaughter of a baron, the daughter of a nazi sympathizer, spent her teens doing ballet to secretly raise money for the dutch resistance against the nazis, and spent her post-film career as a goodwill ambassador of UNICEF, winning the presidential medal of freedom for her efforts.
…and history remembers her as pretty.
AND HISTORY REMEMBERS HER AS PRETTY
this is the first time I have ever seen a picture of her older than 20 and I think that’s scary
there’s a comic book store in my town that gives ladies a 10% discount and the people who work there are really friendly so lots of ladies show up to hang out and buy comics and one time i was looking through some new releases and this guy walked in, saw all the ladies, did a double take, and said really loudly and condescendingly, ‘there sure are a lot of girls in here for a comic store!’ and laughed but no one else laughed with him and it was glorious
Dealing with strong, painful emotions can be overwhelming and even lead to thoughts that your situation is so unfixable that the only way out is suicide. That is NOT true nor the case and every situation is either fixable or something you CAN get through. But when you’re in a high-stress emotional state, we can no longer think logically and do what we can to help ourselves. So the first thing we must do is get ourselves calm down enough to be able to use a coping skill.
* Breathing out longer than you breathe in actually activates your parasympathetic nervous system!
Anxiety is your sympathetic nervous system (“fight or flight”) setting off all the alarms, while breathing like this will set the parasympathetic system (“rest and digest”) into action shutting off the alarms and settling your nerves.
Other things that help: laughing, checking out what’s going on around you (moving head and eyes to orient to your surroundings), getting curious about something. (via notyrqueer)
Note: if you have any medication for anxiety that you are prescribed to take in high stress situations (as opposed to a set time and dosage you do every day on a routine) and you have not reached your maximum prescribed dosage, this might be a good time to take it. But only if you need it.
Once you’ve gotten yourself into a calmer state, we can start to use what’s called our wise mind. Basically we have our emotional mind (which I’m sure we’re all quite familiar with) and our logical or rational mind. Wise mindis the idea that neither one nor the other, but both of these combined is the best way to think about what to do and how to react. If we just used our emotional mind, we’ll get lost in our pain. If we only use our logical mind, we’ll be invalidating our emotions and ignoring that those are important and valid and must be included in how you choose to respond or see a situation. So when you use your wise mind, you can make a more balanced decision.
** Once you are able to be a bit more calm and use your wise mind, you should do what you can to ease whatever it is that is upsetting you. First ask yourself, “Is this the right time to deal with this?” For example, do you need to go to sleep soon so you are fully rested? Would doing so disturb others around you (like doing loud activities while others are sleeping)? Would it negatively affect you to do this right now (the person who is angry is still angry and needs space)? If after consider if it really is the right time to do this right now, and you think it is, then it’s time to fix the problem.
Is it homework? Start working on it. Procrastination will only increase the anxiety as it puts more and more pressure on you the less time you have. (Remember to breathe.) Is it chores? Go get them done. Is it a problem with a friend or loved one? If they are open to talking about it at this time, try that. (There could be a whole post on relationship effectiveness but you can find some information here and here.) Is it making some phone calls? Get them done.
Note: It is entirely okay to ask for help if these things are too overwhelming to do alone. Ask a trusted friend or family member to either sit with you while you make a call, for example, so you can look to them if you need to know what to say or for reassurance that you’re doing okay. Maybe have someone sit near you while you do homework so you know you’re safe. If you can, have someone work through it with you to lessen the load.
† If the problem can’t be fixed right this minute, or it is not the right time to do it, then do what you can to prepare yourself. One way you can do this is through radical acceptance. That means to accept your situation as it is, that you cannot change it right now, and you will have to deal with it. With radical acceptance, you can look at what’s in front of you and really give yourself the ability to problem solve. If you focus too much on what life should be like, or what should have happened instead, or what you or someone else should have done, then you are not looking at the problem in front of you. You are trying to change the past so that it’s not a problem anymore. But the fact is that it is, and it’s upsetting you, so you have to accept that it is happening so that you can do something about it.
‡ If there is nothing you can do right now, then it’s time to focus on what we can do, which is to improve the moment and make “right now” better. The way we do this is to use a coping skill. This means choosing to do activities or actions that make you feel better either by soothing yourself through the senses, being kind to yourself, doing something that can affect the mind through the body (like exercise or calming tea), or distracting yourself. There is more to it than that, but for right now, pick through the list below and choose a few that might help you and remember them. (Maybe keep a journal of things that end up helping you so you can refer back to it in a high emotional state.)
- Listen to music
- Go for a walk
- Take a relaxing bath or shower
- Drink some tea
- Deep breathing (5 counts in, 5 counts out)
- Call/text a friend
- Think about something you are grateful for
- Make a list of things you are grateful for
- Watch a funny video
- Eat your favorite snack while savoring the flavors
- Take a nap
- Journal (write your thoughts/feelings) ….Click here to see the rest of the list.—-I know sometimes it can feel like coping skills won’t help and that because they’re not fixing the event that originally caused the distress, but remember that you can’t think about how to deal with a situation properly when you are solely in your emotional mind. It cuts off your ability to reason fully. So if you can find a way to make yourself feel better, not only will it make it easier to handle the situation at hand, but you being happy is important. You are important. You really deserve to be happy and nothing is unfixable. There are steps you can take to feel better. You just have to give it a try.Note: This post and the information and links provided are not a replacement for real, medical treatment. Please do not stop taking your medication or change your dosage without your doctor’s consent or knowledge.If you are suicidal or thinking about harming yourself please call 911 or call the National Suicidal Hotline at 1-800-273-8255. (U.S. only. To find the suicidal hotline for your country, click here.)
DBT Self-Help Resources: Coping with Extreme Emotions
Tbh this is basically all you learn in rehab and psych wards
And in some cases it’s more…